The Anatomy of a Support Guide. Part 3/6 of the Support Series.

As some of you know I am a medical assistant by day. This is a fairly new career change for me, but it's been amazing. As I've said often, my life changed a LOT in the last few years since the pandemic happened. I got divorced and needed an actual career. I had never had the chance to go to college before my divorce, and so after it ended, I took the chance.

Where I am now is amazing. I love what I do, I love my patients, and I love my coworkers. I've had some growing pains, but very recently I'm finally feeling like everything I'm doing is coming more naturally. Like all the skills I've learned, they're clicking.

I remember when I started, I kept saying "I wish I was at the point where I feel like I know what I'm doing, or I'm good at it.". I think I'm getting there.

This whole life change took a lot of support from a lot of people. Most of which I had never met before I started on this new journey of mine. Many of whom I now consider friends.

My program director, the woman who guided me on this path to becoming a medical assistant, recently reached out and asked if I would host a class for her quarterly presentations for the Oregon Society of Medical Assistants. She explained why my name popped into her brain and told me to "talk about something you're passionate about".

Immediately, I thought about support.

I thought about my failed attempts at releasing a book for teenagers with a support guide at the end of it, tailored to them, when suddenly the pandemic happened, and everything came to a halt.

And I thought about my newest book that I'm working on, my next attempt to reach people on the same topic of support.

Support is everything!

And yet, most of us don't have what we need of it.

Everything I'm doing right now is centered around this word, so of course, my class was going to be, too.

It went great. I can see how I could improve on it, of course, there's always room for improvement, and I have new ideas now that the class is over.

Because I'm working very hard on creating an online space for all things SUPPORT-centered, I wanted to share with you on this blog a mini support guide, or a mini version of what I gave to this class.

This is yet another teaser for what I hope to launch at the end of this year, 2025.

This is a very small version of what could be very big in your life, and I will expand on it over time, but this can hold you for now. This can get you thinking about what support looks like in your life.

Something I learned from the class I just taught is that we do need time to sit in the very big emotions that come with understanding what support does and does not look like in our lives.

I did not realize how vulnerable it would become, and now, of course, it all makes sense that it would be that vulnerable, and honestly, a little difficult to recognize within ourselves what we might be lacking.

After all, that's why I share my own stories of how I came into support, too.

It has not come easy for me to find the support I need in my life, and it has taken a HUGE amount of self-reflection, and more often than not, that self-reflection has caused a lot of scary emotions.

I really want to be aware of that moving forward with all that I'm doing.

With all that being said, here is the Mini-Support-Guide. Gently use this for self-reflection around what you need, and how better to support yourself throughout your day-to-day:

Noticing, Pausing, and Reaching

Noticing:

Before we reach for support, we learn to recognize the signs that we need it.

Signals might show up as:

• Body: tension, fatigue, racing heart

• Mind: fog, irritability, forgetfulness

• Behavior: withdrawal, rushing, overcommitting

Journal prompt:   What does overwhelm feel like in my body, mind, or behavior?

Pausing:

Pausing is the bridge between noticing and support. It’s a moment to ask:

• What do I need right now?

• Am I overwhelmed?

• How can I clear my mind?

Pause to reflect on what you're experiencing in moments of stress and overwhelm.

Reaching:

Support often lives in relationships. Name the people who help you feel safe, seen, or supported.

• Person - name the people who support you in various parts of your life.

• Place - name the places you go that help you feel centered.

• Thing - name the tools that calm you.
  

Reflection:   Who helps me remember my strength, and how can I reach out when I need to?

It's important to write down names, and the additional challenge is to reach out to just one person and say, "If I need support, can I lean on you?" Support is not a luxury. It’s a skill. And like any skill, it begins with awareness, intention, and practice.

“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” — Maya Angelou

That's it for now, but not forever.

I'm working on HUGE ways to show you guys all the various forms of support you can have, can think about, and can cultivate for yourself.

You deserve support. You deserve to understand what it does and does not look like in your life. You deserve to understand how to set healthy boundaries and reach out to people you know are safe and that you can trust.

Work through this short guide on your own time.

And reach for one person, place, or tool that helps you center yourself so you can keep moving forward.